Over on another web site, I was discussing the Parable of the Good Samaritan, and how modern audiences often miss a key point of the story: The 1st Century Jewish target audience of the Parable loathed Samaritans, and the feeling was mutual. So, charity was not the sole point of the story; the point was also that someone who would have been expected to be least likely to help was the one who helped.

I decided to come up with a modern version of it.

continued...

A good, right thinking American conservative was visiting Washington, DC to attend CPAC. The conservative did not have his gun with him, since he followed the city's unjust gun laws. He was set upon by robbers and left for dead.

An NRA member drove by in a Lincoln Navigator and noticed his plight, but thought, "well, if he had been carrying a gun, he would have been able to defend himself. He deserves his fate." He sped away to the NRA headquarters off I-66 to have dinner at the restaurant there.

Then, a pro-life activist walked by, but she said to herself, "he's an adult and can take care of himself. I have to go save defenseless little babies." She picked up her picket sign and headed to that day's protest at Planned Parenthood.

But, a gay liberal drove by in his Prius, and saw the conservative, and took pity on him. He folded down the back seat, to allow plenty of room for the wounded conservative to lie down. He then drove him to the hospital, where he was admitted to the emergency room.

The admissions nurse told the liberal that the conservative didn't have health insurance. The liberal pulled out his Greenpeace logo MasterCard and said "let him stay till he's fully recovered; don't kick him out as soon as you legally can." He then called some of his other liberal friends, and they held a bake sale at the organically-grown locally-raised food co-op to to raise money to pay the conservative's bills.

When the conservative left the hospital, he learned the man who saved him was gay, so he went to get an AIDS test because he thought all gays carried AIDS and it was spread by casual contact. He then started calling all of his favorite talk radio shows, blaming liberal social values for his mugging.